Addressing the intimidation I feel when writing to women I admire, such as Paulita Pappel, Amanda Montell, and Erika Lust. (experimenting with a more diaristic and extemporaneous style)

Yesterday, I wrote an email to erotic film director Erika Lust, expressing my interest in writing for her Lustzine. Ms. Lust is the second “big name” in ethical porn I’ve reached out to since I’ve decided to seek work in a role that helps me contribute to sex-positive professionals. Last weekend, I reached out to […]

Some thoughts on The Ethical Slut (part book review, part personal essay)

In early October of 2019, at the suggestion of a former therapist, in response to my telling her that I found myself thinking about sex almost all the time (and that I hated myself for it, fearing I must have been some sort of “pervert” and that I was betraying my wife for constantly wanting […]

Denying my love for sex, feeling constant guilt and shame: a few sources of my social anxiety

Often, social anxiety can seize me simply because, frankly, I’m often so sexual that 1) due to repressing my erotophilia, I experience a bit of OCD and think overwhelmingly about sex, 2) I worry that it’s “written all over my face,” as if I were blushing, and that it might make someone feel uncomfortable. Don’t […]

Am I “obsessed” with sex or “passionate” and “in love with it?” (the first of a new series of blog posts about my insecurities, curiosities, and fascinations regarding sex)

Am I obsessed with sex or am I passionate about and in love with it? Well, this depends on how you are defining the terms. The Oxford English Dictionary provides, I believe, the most flexible of dictionary definitions for the word “obsessed”: In the sense that my mind is “filled” with thoughts about sex, I […]

On Polyamory: part 3 (a variation on part 1)

On  Polyamory: part 3 (a variation on part 1) Maybe it was an auditory hallucination resulting from my sexual frustration and wishful imagination, but the moaning and sexual phrases I thought I heard a neighbor of mine scream (presumably in the midst of fucking and/or making love) blazed through nerves with extreme intensity, like New […]

Some of the Psychology of Interdisciplinary Thinking, the Covid Pandemic, and Erectile Dysfunction (Sunday, July 26th, 2020)

Learning to Reach for the Northern Star and Toss the Anchor into the Sea It is one of those mornings when the mind struggles to focus, not so much as a symptom of Attention Deficit Disorder…though some people claim to believe A.D.D. is my fundamental ailment or struggle with my constant shifts on objects of […]

Contemplating Sexual Desires With Compassion (Saturday, July 25th, 2020)

Oh…striving for competence! And along with that, a conscience…embrace of ethics/morality (and already I see two different directions this stream of thoughts could go: 1)) deep into the abstract forests of why we might suppose such a thing as ethics/morality exists or…ought to be recognized as a conducive standard to living out of ***respect*** for […]

Sexual Orientation, Philosophy, & Evidence (Friday, July 24th, 2020)

The Role of Philosophy in Forming Certain Sexual Thoughts, Feelings, Desires, and Speculations One reason it’s so hard for some of us to think about and discuss sex openly and comfortably, I suspect (and I emphasize the word “suspect”; just like the cops identify someone as a suspect but can’t yet compile quite enough EVIDENCE […]