Dissociation

Isn’t it the case

that one’s

“self”

is the same

thing as one’s

brain?

Or the mind/consciousness and unconscious,

which the brain makes?

…Such contemplations lead to

dissociation

and panic attacks

because they accentuate

the idea that free-will/choice/control

is all bullshit

and that the soul is…

such as Behaviorists insist… Ivan Pavlov and his dog, John B. Watson and B.F. Skinner–

stimulation and response;

the idea, in other words, that all aspects of reality

are mere automatons,

though some with ironic, paradoxical consciousness

that project, develop, and maintain illusions

of significance

based on what may seem like

coincidences of physics…

and yet…if that’s all this universe

and human consciousness is…

why must it happen to be the case

that it leads me to dissociate?

Cruel coincidence of fate?

Like tsunamis that come and terminate

so many human lives

who never had a chance, never had any say,

like genetic diseases…

brains so full of hate…

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