drafts from “Erotophilia”

[UPDATED 5/3/20: So my plan as of now is to share more of the “drafting process.” Since my last update to this blog post I’ve made several changes to this piece, formerly “Love & Compassion for Self & Others” and also briefly titled “Polyamory.” Now the working title is “Erotophilia” (see the beginning of the piece for more on the significance of the term)

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[UPDATED DRAFT: 4/19/20; So, this is a work in progress on a complex hybrid piece about, as the title suggests, love and compassion– some of it more about conceptualizing one’s self, some of it erotic, and some of it about friendship, et cetera. Someone on Instagram mentioned an interest in seeing what this draft in profess is about and this inspired me to make what I have thus far (mistakes and all) available for the curious. I feel also motivated because, due to the context of our times, with social distancing and all, I believe there is a need for more online amusement. Should literary drafts be your thing, well then here it is. I am also by the way, open to feedback. I hope you might get something positive out of this read. Currently I don’t have any achor links and I hope you can forgive me for this however I have broken this down into pages as to have a more pleasant and almost e-book like read instead of long scrolling text with no sense of end in sight. The entire piece is, as of now, roughly 39 pages.

Brief Table of Contents

Headnote…….. page 1

introduction/progue in a slight digressive/stream-of-consciousness-“ish” form; these are the thoughts of Emile Hope: ………page 2

1 I-Self esteem/self confidence/ self love/ self actualization……  page 5

A)I wonder if it takes starting with self esteem and self confidence before one can venture into self love let alone self actualization …..page 5

*b) Mind/Soul/Consciousness of “Self” As Such, Contemplated*….. page 6

*c) If there is a self, Should Not the Self “actualize?” …..page 7

*d), *e), *f), g): untitled verses…. pages 7-21

2 Emile’s Erectile Dysfunction…..  page 22

3 Emile Hope’s Experience of Shame… page 25

4 Pornography/Erotica & Voyeurism/Exhibitionism ……. page 31

5.) Tiffany’s Desire…… page 32

6 Overcoming jealousy ….. page 34

7.) Jasmine and Alyosha Meet …..page 36

Video reading an earlier draft
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Author: The Literature of Sean O'Connor

Hi, I'm Sean. I’m a writer. My favorite poets, my literary role models, are Bob Dylan and John Lennon; I also draw heavily from the fiction of Thomas Mann, the non-fiction of Phillip Lopate, and the prose of David Foster Wallace. Other poets and writers I love include Percy Shelley, Lord Byron, Edna St. Vincent Millay, Claude McKay, and A.E. Stallings, Milan Kundera, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Robert Musil, Susan Sontag, Leslie Jamison, Michel de Montaigne, and Ralph Waldo Emerson, My themes tend towards the philosophical and psychological, exploring the idea of what it might mean and be like to live an ever improving life. I’m currently pursuing my MFA in Creative & Professional Writing at William Paterson University, where I also received my BA in Liberal Studies (with concentrations in Political Science & History). I also work as a writing tutor for Raritan Valley Community College. Aside from my writing, I’m vehemently political, fascinated with human sexuality, open about my polyamory and…I love dogs. My wife and I adopted a Siberian mix from St. Hubert’s Animal Welfare Center in October of 2019.

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